What are the synonyms for 'Blah' ?

Being a teen is very hard. But being a post-teen adult seems to be harder. Technically I am not an ‘adult’ yet. My birthday’s only coming but since people always say I’m twenty years old (mostly my mother when she wants me to be more ‘responsible’!), I think it makes more sense to start thinking of myself as an adult. Lately I have come to realize that I have a problem with relationships.. No, no no.. Not ‘relationships’.. any relationship be it friendship, mother-daughter or between sisters. Or maybe because I have had problems in almost every sphere of relationship, I just sort of feel like I want to be left alone.
I haven’t written a post in a very long time. In fact I haven’t written anything in a very long time. Its quite sad, really. Even my mum tells her poet friends that her daughter ‘used’ to write poetry. So much for confidence in my mother’s belief in me! On the bright side, my cousin recently told me that she thought I should stick with journalism cos I write well.
That’s the thing, chech… anything that I am compelled to do, I lose interest in! Like academics.. as long as my parents were not bothered, I was fine.. doing very well (if I say so myself). When I came into college, it was expected of me to get outstanding marks, studying sort of lost its charm. Then blogging itself. I wasn’t the first blogger in my class, and definitely not the last. It was something I enjoyed a lot and I thought I was a pretty decent one at that. Then everyone expected me to blog, thought it was part of my character. It didn’t go with a bang.. just sort of faded out.. Still, evidently there is at least some left.
I thought I wanted to study after my degree.. Maybe do a PhD. I don’t know anymore…
Everything seems to be changing. A world where its possible for someone of average intelligence like me to get a 99% in what’s supposed to be a competitive exam, sure seems abnormal.
Yes. Unbelievable, isn’t it? Well, congratulations are welcome as both money and goods to my postal address…

P.S. – Did I mention that I’m smiling on my own a lot more? Guess that’s that..