Through the Looking Glass

I have a crush on someone absolutely inappropriate.
I dont like having crushes on someone as inappropriate as this (and no, you pervert, it's not a girl - that wouldn't be inappropriate unless she was married).

Well. You know.. I started this post because of the overwhelming urge to tell someone about him. About his mind-numbing sarcastic wit, irresistable charm hidden under layers of absolute rudeness, his bubbly laugh whenever he picks on me...

Yeah. I know what you're thinking - he doesn't sound very nice. Well, he isn't. Not to me, at least. But then, that is what I want. You see, people (if there are any left), I've discovered I'm a masochist. A sick sick person who enjoys being picked on, made fun of and absolutely tortured. That's what gets me.

Now about him... I didn't think he knew I liked him - let's just say I've been keeping it well hidden, or so I thought... Until I realised, that suddenly his digs were not understood by anyone else - they made sense only if you cued in the fact that I have a humongous crush on him.
(By the way, if someone thinks this is too personal or too repititive or simply boring - Eff off. It's my personal space. Mine. Hear that?)

So anyway... I wanted to express that overwhelming surge of feelings that comes over me when I'm being ridiculed by him, or when I am talking to him or merely when I think about him. Trsut me, this experience has definitely given me a whole new perspective of the extremely thin, almost-nvisible line between love and hate. Not that I love him. At least, not yet.

Anyway as I was saying I wanted to express those feelings, so I did what I always do - start a diary. Didn't help. Told a few friends. Didn't work, either. So then I thought, I'll restart that dead blog of mine which has been rotting in my closet.. But then.. I thought - why not start a new one?!

So ladies, gentlemen and the rest of you assorted creatures who still read this blog.. I am moving.

Ta!